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Useful Links For Authors Author Guidelines Article Writing Tips Why Submit Articles HomeArt & Entertainment ArticlesHumor Articles10 Signs You’re Addicted to Social Media10 Signs You’re Addicted to Social Media By Martyn Davies on August 29, 2012 0
My name is Martyn, and I’m a social media addict
Every morning, as soon as I wake up I reach for my iPhone and feverishly check how many followers I’ve picked up overnight, tweet a quick hello and move on to check my Klout score. I freely admit that I’m addicted to social media, but it’s OK – it’s part of my job, kind of.
What I should be doing is leaping out of bed and tending the SEO needs of my clients and building killer websites. But, I tell myself, it’s 6 am… I don’t need to start work yet, and spend the next three hours Facebooking un-funny thoughts, looking for news I can tweet and pinning pictures on my Pinterest boards.
And there’s nothing abnormal about tweeting from the loo or taking my iPhone into the bath with me. I can stop instagram followers any time I want, really I can.
How much social media is too much? Are you a fellow addict? I’ve gathered together the top signs that indicate that you might need help:
1. Your smartphone lights up to tell you when absolutely anything happens online. RTs, mentions, direct messages. You’ve got your phone buzzing and chirruping like a rain forest and have lost the ability to concentrate on anything at all.
2. You use social media terms as verbs. i.e you Facebook stories and Instagram your images. I bet you love it when athletes podium.
3. In real life social situations, you can’t tell your friends amusing stories about your life because they’ve all read them on Facebook already. I suppose it keeps conversations short, you can get back to your smartphone quicker.
4. You spll wrds without vwls when u handwrite notes and shopping lists 4 real life ppl. Wnkr.
5. You honestly believe that your “friends” need to know what you’ve just eaten. Crissakes, you even Instagram the meal and are more than ready to comment “nom, nom, nom” whenever anyone else shares a picture of their breakfast/dinner/fast food snack.
6. You’ve checked your Klout score, um, ever. ‘Nuff said.
7. You’re fascinated by other people’s holiday pix. Listen, if you’d gone round to their house and they fired up a slideshow of their recent Kefalonia trip they’d be off your Xmas card list and out of your social circle in a heartbeat. But somehow, in the wee small hours of the morning when you can’t sleep, OP’s holiday snaps become endlessly fascinating.
8. You use hashtags in email or texts to indicate that a joke has been made. #whoknew? #ifeelsuchafool
9. You know what FriendFace is. You don’t go there though, that would be uncool.
10. You just Googled FriendFace because you thought you were missing out.
Martyn Davies is a co-founder of the social media management agency Content Frog. For the last 30 years he has been an advertising creative, a web builder and a marketeer. He is a self proclaimed raconteur and comedian – on a part time basis, or as his friends call him, a half wit. Follow him on Twitter @steadymarvin.
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